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GEM

by Soultree

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1.
Mm yea yea You remind me who I used to be and I don’t wanna be that I been looking at you I don’t wanna see that & the way you’re acting I don’t believe that So I don’t take it I had to leave that I had to leave that in that in the past The shit you’re doing won’t last Don’t care bout spells that you cast We’re all on our own paths I had to lead to by example yea I had to give you the sample I had to give you exhibits I had to just live it I had to just give it some time I let my craft simmer in a pot I been thinking a lot I’m Glad we didn’t get caught When herb was as illegal as all we got Have ever seen a tree as illegal as me? Call me my illegal name that’s Stephanie Ain’t Life funny? It ain’t punny as me My spirit rooted in the herb that’s why they call me soultree You remind me who I used to be and I don’t wanna be that I been looking at you I don’t wanna see that & the way you’re acting I don’t believe that So I don’t take it I had to leave that I had to leave that in that in the past The shit you’re doing won’t last Don’t care bout spells you cast We’re all on our own paths I been blessed I been blessed I don’t even have to stress I had to get it off my chest That fateful night We didn’t even wear a vest we’re learning to live learning to rest Cold dark winters they put us through the test turn trouble Into triumphs when I’m serving my best Called my destiny over all she said was say less Say less and you pay less Say less You remind me who I used to be and I don’t wanna be that I been looking at you I don’t wanna see that & the way you’re acting I don’t believe that So I don’t take it I had to leave that I had to leave that in that in the past The shit you’re doing won’t last Don’t care bout spells you cast We’re all on our own paths
2.
Affected 02:54
Oo hoo hoo hoo 2x yea You don’t know how badly you affect me I wont let u affect me with these emotions I been wide open Like the oceans that I come from I been swimming for a lump sum I been sulking feeling lonesome It’s been chilly let’s go get some yea Always acting like I don’t love you Like you You don’t love me Like we don’t love ourselves Always acting like there ain’t enough for everyone else It’s in the things you do and you don’t do Certainly certainly applies to me too Do you know how deeply You touch me You could say less and I’ll still feel the same way Come on over ube We don’t love with fear now I am feeling freer now From the front & to the rear now Im speaking so much clearer now, yea Gotta show me that I can love me That you can love you That we love can ourselves Gotta show us that there is enough for everyone else
3.
Only Human 03:14
Oo yea yea yea Yea Yea writings and mirrors all over the walls I get so sad when summer turns to fall I really prefer it when you do not call We’re only human at the end of it all When you live it up you are having a ball Tryna do the same but your laws have me stalled while you build a wall x2 Was deep in self-denial I acted like a child What I couldn’t say then Im feeling now My jaw locked up in the presence of your energy Throat chakra sensing who are friends n enemies Most times it ain’t worth fight or fine Won’t take no shit if that shit ain’t mine called upon for crisis and prevention Got God complex need an intervention I know I could tell I read it in your spell Read the spelling Cho. writings and mirrors all over the walls I get so sad when summer turns to fall I really prefer it when you do not call We’re only human at the end of it all When you live it up you are having a ball Tryna do the same but your laws have me stalled while you build a wall I was the only who wasn’t ready But there are names I’m gladly forgetting Took steps forward and a long pause now I’m back to easy rock steady Don’t give a fuck about all your opinions banana heads do love acting like minions Futile wars are for egos and heroes Keep my level a 💯 when im wasting zeroes i gotta belt it out Melting the fear without a doubt This whole time I figured it out Without my feet on the ground I was just chasing clouds
4.
We’ve been through this before together My brother, we’ve stormed worse weather Like a feather so light n outta sight Knowing deep in our hearts that we deserve better Couldn’t speak the words, so I wrote it in a letter Reinvent myself so much ppl like, “no I never met her” Hmm It’s “they/them”, this is the self I always knew Anomaly to most biting more than I can chew, yea Yea I don’t know I don’t know Oo Where to go where to go So we just go we just go with the flow Yea I’m a biter I’m a fighter I’m a climber you could find me on paper in a folder or a binder Or a book you crook got the type of vibe that makes everybody look You could get hooked but that’s not in my intention I pray we are all sovereign over self, did I mention? Divine by design creatrix extension Balancing the worlds in delicate suspension Yea I don’t know I don’t know Oo Where to go where to go So we just go we just go with the flow with the flow
5.
Funky Thang 02:58
Sang sang Sang now Sang I’m feeling well & free when my siblings see me With DC on the beat we just got to release Paru in the room dancing circles round you Kuya josh got jewels that can see your trees through Then we got Jean n Jane moving our bodies n brains With the power of spirit we breaking through these chains, yea Sang that thang the funky thang They want me to Sang that thang the funky thang I just got to Sang that thang the funky way song told me to sang that thang the funky sang We are some walang hiyas laughing loud like hyenas/high inas your bamboo ceiling ain’t high enough You can roll with us if you soft but tough Full off the leaves and fruits from the trees Healing from our crowns to the roots of our feet Some Days we cry, laugh, lament in defeat we change up the cycles so we do not repeat Been singing so funky they call me stefunky White people called us their little brown Monkeys And little brown brothers they raped our mothers & still can’t tell us apart from each other Tonight we will sang that funky thang You know how to Sang that thang the funky thang They want me to sang that thang the funky thang I Got to just show that thang show them that funky twang Show them you got a funkin say Why don’t we just Sang that thang that funky thang Let’s do that thang the funky way Song told me to sang that thang the funky sang Do that thang
6.
Severe/d 03:32
Oo oo Oo Oo Oo Oo Hah hah haaa We were in the desert clothes a little tethered Just like birds we stay fly and flock together I honor the lines on my face and the way the skin hangs now Our greatest grand lolas smiled through depression somehow Surviving things too dark to mention or speak out loud We are like a million suns peering through the clouds Disappearing and disappeared gotta let go of all fear I channel the messages and meanings of those I revere That shit’s severe And we’ve been severed Is this the herstory you do not remember been keeping a light for you a flicker in my ember I knew you’d come back in the middle of November for that I’m thankful for that I’m thankful Nagpapasalamat sa lupa, langit at dagat Ang karga karga natin ay sobrang mabigat Dahan dahan lang tayo sa ating pag akyat Kaya thing nagpapaalam sinasabi ingat Ilang libong taon na tayong nagpapatayan Tungkol sa sarili natin wala tayong kamalayaan Anong klaseng pekeng at pinagtanggol na kalayaan Binigay daw s’atin hanggang ngayon binabayaran Translation. Giving thanks to earth, heaven, and ocean What we are carrying is so heavy Careful as we climb That’s why when fare well we say take care How many thousands of years have we killing each other About ourselves we have no awareness/knowledge What kind of fake and defended freedom They said they gave to us until now we’re paying it back Putang ina putang ama Mga hayop tayong lahat basura natin nakabuka sa kalsada Binabasta ang buhay tulad ng maduming labada Kaya nagwawala at nawala bawa’t isa sa atin Sa atin Sa atin Sa Atin lahat yan Bawa’t Isa Trans. Mother fucker Father fucker We are all animals Our garbage lying open in the road Disregarding life like it’s dirty laundry That’s why we’re breaking out and missing/lost Every single one Back home Ours Back home Ours all of them/that Everyone single one That shit’s severe And we’ve been severed Don’t you remember
7.
You know I be missing you You know I wish I was kissing you You know I be missing you You know I wish I was on (uh) you Loving me slow loving me low We have the rest of this life to go You know every word I say is true I love when you love me all the way through I been longing for you babes when you’re gone Can’t text all day so I put in a song If loving you ain’t right / don’t give a fuck if I’m wrong (edited: then i don’t care if I’m wrong) We know our love’s tough / & it’s going so strong I know I’m rageful / like a ri/ver you go along I am so grateful we’ve been loving so long Pounds and papers / putting years to the test With every verse and beat/ lay/ our /fears & demons to rest/ With you I’ve grown in every single way I even got some shape to this little bootay We’re budding more than flowers got a whole bouquet That’s why when anybody asks I say “I’m so mabutayyy” hey You know I be missing you You know I wish I was kissing you You know I be missing you You know I wish I was kissing you Loving me slow loving me low We have the rest of this life to go You know every word I say is true I love when you love me all the way through Love is daily commitment, love is daily practice I Ain’t moved to Hollywood with you to win best leading actress Bet I could if I set my mind to it But I wannabe real so I put time into it I’m intuitive seen all of this & us coming Made a sexy lullaby with just me humming Baby love my rhythm got my hauzband drumming reteaching ourselves the way we wanna feel loving Used to run away, but lately I’m running toward Didn’t always have a life that I could look forward To livin but that’s been changing bit by bit Found my twin flame in you and baby together we’re so lit You know I be missing you You know I wish I was kissing you You know I be missing you You know I wish I was kissing you Loving me slow loving me low We have the rest of this life to go You know every word I say is true I love when you love me all the way through
8.
The pain I let it go yea That hurt let it go yea Yesterday was then Today is now Our Blessed Future happens when we answer why not how I love it when u say my name I love it when u call Still receive ur msg when u text nothing at all We are so connected borders between us so liminal Loving against the law you’re deep in it with a criminal I been doing all I can said I stand for justice Why we workin together if you can’t even trust us Opening our wounds n faults in the front lines We couldn’t build trust on secrets, falsehoods, n lies Back then I just felt used I found a sound that would honor me Bitches talk shit (Edit: haters talk ill) never let none of their bull ever bother me I got my truth and so do they still hope u find a outlet for the shit/things u gotta say The pain I let it go yea That hurt let it go yea Yesterday was then Today is now Our Blessed Future happens when we answer why not how The pain I let it go yea That hurt let it go yea Yesterday was then Today is now Our Blessed Future happens when we answer why not how Love, life, and losses Turned into wives, workers, and bosses Made ourselves a governable, conquerable thing Labeled and Packaged in plastics and boxes Everything requires documentation Is there really such a thing as sovereignty When all aspects of me must be verified by an entity given more power to decide a truth that I am living? We want someone to blame and we want it all on paper in a court of lawlessness that has determined too many melanated, queer, and ill bodies unable to regulate themselves fighting for scraps centered in ego Until we elevate to that place of forgiveness and cocreation not for profit or by prophet, but for and by the people, truly, equitably, with open hearts, minds, and extensions of ourselves forever and ever and ever. Mabuhay Ka. Asé. The pain I let it go yea That hurt let it go yea Yesterday was then Today is now Our Blessed Future happens when we answer why not how The pain I let it go yea That hurt let it go yea Yesterday was then Today is now Our Blessed Future happens when we answer why not how

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released November 22, 2022

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Soultree

Multi-disciplinary, multi-genre Pilipinx Marshallese Undocumented Queer vocalist, songWriter, poet, and Creator based in Chicago and LA

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